today I rest my muscles and exercise my BRAINS

Plural “BRAINS?” you ask. Why, yes. My Right Brain creative is going to write a poem, and my Left Brain critic is going to delete it.

It’s a brilliant partnership WE have going on here. You’d love Us. We are not afraid to create anything because we know it won’t last long. Did I mention I’m a pyromaniac? I find it’s something both sides can enjoy (besides this very fine photo of Hugh Laurie).

Lefty speaks

Cough. On a serious note, I started this Fitness Course by correspondence that I had hoped to be finished by now. Then I…(i.e. Lefty) got intimidated by the fact that we had to actually KNOW stuff, and I could only convince myself to color the muscle diagrams with pencil crayon. What’s this Tensor Fasciae Latae? It must be a drink…I’m going to get a Starbucks…

Righty interrupts (it’s about time)

What. I love muscles. I just ate a protein bar. Now I’m thinking about how a timely text from my husband the other day felt so amazing. They don’t come often, but they are worth waiting for. Lefty feels beautiful and sexy and happy. Strangely, she thinks muscles come in handy in the sexual creativity department, and daydreaming only takes a minute…

Lefty here again

I’ll try to keep this on topic. Did you know that when you exercise, you are actually tearing your muscles? It’s only during the times of rest that they rebuild. If you just keep exercising, even though you are sore as hell, you aren’t doing yourself any favors. There is a message in there, my friends. A deep message. I had to stop myself from taking another Cardio Class this morning because I could hardly walk yesterday. Sometimes I can be so rational.

Are you done yet? Seriously.
Righty is bringing sexy back

Muscles are marvelous tools. They help you get places and stuff. Relaxing can be overrated. Or not. You choose. I should learn more about that. Yes, Lefty, I’m on my way. Just don’t deny me the poem you promised me:

Jumping squats make tender spots
Right in your…
ass abs.

Protein bars feed muscle cars
When you release…
gas flabs.

You have no idea how long that took me.
THE END.

For more freakishly amazing poetry, pop over to my poetry blog (Lefty wants to delete this. Damn you, Lefty.)

“Sometimes you just have to take a break from the think, think, thinking. Do something just for yourself and stop feeling guilty about it. I just gave you permission. You’re welcome.”

____________________________________________

Righty: Is that a real quote if you’ve never said it before?
Lefty: I just said it now. It’s real – like drama – baby.
Righty: Then it’s not a quote, because you’re not quoting anything.
Lefty: Time to relax, smarty pants.